Mohamed Salah’s Liverpool career (so far) in extremely niche and obscure stats

Football has come a long way from contract negotiations that took just minutes and were concluded with a firm handshake in a car park.

When he was in the process of looking for a new club in 2009, Michael Owen produced a glossy brochure, which, among other things, addressed his injury record, his levels of desire and whether he really travelled ‘to Newcastle from his stables in Cheshire every day by helicopter’ (spoiler: apparently not).

More recently Kevin De Bruyne used various — presumably superior — metrics when negotiating his new deal with Manchester City in 2021.

We don’t know whether Mohamed Salah’s new Liverpool contract was reliant on him providing evidence that he can continue to score and assist in industrial quantities, but it surely played a fairly big role in what sounds like a relatively smooth process.

But what if the wrangling had been much tougher? What if Salah and his entourage had been forced to go much deeper to persuade Liverpool that he was worth a new deal?

Including Man Utd players, Mohamed Salah is the seventh-highest PL scorer at Old Trafford in the 2020s

— Duncan Alexander (@oilysailor) April 11, 2025

In short, what if it had gone a bit like this?

Liverpool: Look, clearly the number of goals you have scored is impressive, but all our metrics show that these days variety is extremely important to fans. It’s all very well repeatedly bending in the ball with extraordinary skill from the right-hand side of the box, but where are the close-range finishes?

Salah camp: Please refer to Mr Salah’s goal against Southampton in September 2018 from a mere 0.97m or, if you want a more recent example, what about the 1.32m effort against Brentford in May 2023? Are they close enough for you?

Liverpool: Very good. Next question, is Mr Salah capable of scoring a goal that fits this specific description: ‘An effort that is strongly reminiscent of a overly-eager dad scoring past some eight-year-olds in a park’?

Salah camp: May we present Mr Salah’s goal against Bournemouth in December 2018?



Liverpool: Yes, that very much satisfies that requirement. Can Mr Salah score headed goals, by the way? We could do with some more headers, if possible?

Salah camp: Mr Salah has as many headed Premier League goals as Harry Maguire. As Troy Deeney. As Tomas Soucek. He has three times as many as the Delap family, Rory and Liam.

Liverpool: Again, fine. Thank you. OK, next question. Obviously, Mr Salah is a Premier League icon, but we are looking to broaden his appeal to fans of EFL clubs — is there anything you can suggest there?

Salah camp: He has scored as many Premier League goals as Bradford City, Cardiff City and Huddersfield Town combined. He has had more touches in the opposition penalty area than Sheffield United have in the Premier League this decade. Is that enough?

Liverpool: Er, got anything specific on Watford?

Salah camp: (rifling through notes) Four goals from just four shots against them at Anfield in 2018. Observers called it the perfect mix of effectiveness and disdain.

Dealing with Watford with ease (Jan Kruger/Getty Images)

Liverpool: That should do it, thank you.  Do you have anything generally on him haunting teams more than any other player? That sort of stuff always goes down well.

Salah camp: How about the fact that he’s the only player in Premier League history to outscore three separate teams in a single season? Namely, Huddersfield, Swansea City and West Bromwich Albion in 2017-18.

Liverpool: Impressive, but that was a while ago now, and we only came fourth that season.

Salah camp: May we suggest consulting a league table urgently? Mr Salah currently has more goals than Southampton and Leicester City and is only four behind Ipswich Town. It’s very much on. Oh, and these goals mean Liverpool are about to win the league.

Liverpool: Ah, yes, all fair points. And winning the league is quite important to us, as you know. We’ll go level on 20 titles with Manchester United this summer. Can you confirm that Mr Salah will continue to torment United if he stays with Liverpool?

Salah camp: Look, he’s the seventh-highest-scoring player at Old Trafford in the 2020s — including their own players. He’s scored more goals against Manchester United than against any other side. He’s taken part in a 4-0, a 5-0 and a 7-0 win against them in the past three and a half years. It’s a strong CV.

EVERY Mohamed Salah goal against Man Utd in the Premier League 🇪🇬👑 pic.twitter.com/tAMPdLguOZ

— Premier League (@premierleague) September 6, 2024

Liverpool: OK, fine. Deal.

(Top photo: Glyn Kirk/AFP via Getty Images)

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